“I… told her to shove the milkshake up her ass”
Everybody knows that the lemmings that work behind our favorite fast food counters aren’t the type to be one day nominated for the Nobel Prize. Myspace Momo, perhaps, but as for a breakthrough in modern science, literature, or sociology, forget about it. These are just people that we have to deal with, depending on your fast food intake, daily, weekly, or if you’re hardcore, never. Kudos to you guys to whom this post doesn’t apply. But I’m sure you still know about these jackasses that seem to think that making $7 per hour gets them a license that entitles them to get away with being dumber than the dead animals they serve.
“…not wanting any bodily solid, liquid, or combination thereof… complied.”
This first bit happened about 2 weeks ago, when I decided to “reward” myself with a couple of tacos and a chicken sandwich from Jack in the Box. After ordering, I pulled up to the window on my moped, paid, and waited. And waited. Finally, one of our heroes came to the window and asked me to pull up in front of the store, out of the drive thru line. This has happened before, but seeing as there was nobody behind me, I didn’t see a point to doing this, and told him this. He again asked me, and, not wanting any sort of bodily solid, liquid, or combination thereof in my tacos decided to comply. I hadn’t realized that it had started raining while I was sitting in the covered drive thru line, so I became pretty angry pretty fast once I was waiting in front of the store for my food, when there was still nobody behind me. He came out about 20 seconds later with my food, which made me even more angry – why did I have to pull out of the covered line to wait an extra 20 seconds when I wasn’t holding up any line, and it made him walk further and got me all wet? I’ve certainly waited longer than about the minute and 20 seconds the entire process took for other people ahead of me before. Really, what the hell is the point of that? Is there some logic that I just can’t seem to comprehend, or is it the lack of a completed secondary education on his part that inconvenienced everybody involved?
“…the fat monsters and rotten-toothed crackheads that were working”
This second part happened yesterday at Burger King. All day I was craving a milk shake and thought I’d go get one because I was bored. I pulled up, ordered, and waited in line for the window. There were two cars ahead of me, and they managed to take about 10 minutes before finally being able to give me my shake. Where’s the “pull up in front of the store” now? Anyways, once I got to the window, I hear the gigglings and arguing of the fat monsters and the rotten-toothed crackheads that were working, talking about how one threw ketchup at the other and so-and-sos baby daddy did this. They finally acknowledged my presence, and I went to give her my checkcard, and she took it, put it on the counter inside, and said they didn’t take credit card. I politely explained that they do, and I’ve used this card there before. She again said they didn’t, and I pointed to the machine that swipes the card, and explained to her how to do it. This went on for about 2 minutes before a manager came, and basically told me the same thing in the same broken english except threw in the words “communication” and “broken” in there. So then I said, “OH, your system is down, and you can’t process credit transactions?” And she said “yes, we don’t take credit card, only cash.” Then why take my card? I then asked why didn’t she say so, or even put a sign on the drive thru menu, or make sure that people are going to pay with cash so they don’t have to sit in a drive thru for 10 minutes and not even get a mother f*cking milkshake. She didn’t have an answer, I told her I didn’t have cash (who does these days) and ended with a “soooo, uhhh….” And she just stood there and stared at me, so I reached in, grabbed my card, told her to shove the milkshake up her ass, and tried my best to peel out on my moped. It again was raining, and I again got wet. And I’m sure she fed that milkshake to one of the fat monsters in the back.
Seriously, if it’s not incorrect change, incorrect food, or just total stupidity, it must be something caused by those retarted headsets these people wear. I swear, one of these days I’m going to just reach in and slap them all.
That clearly wasn’t Subway in the Dole Building from Honblue days. Remember, the place where I routinely received free upgrades.